Monday, May 4, 2009

In- Between

One of the feelings that I dislike most in life is the feeling of being in-between. What I mean by this is that I don't feel like any of my work has paid off at this point. I have been working hard toward my immediate goal of being an art teacher and my long-term goal of being a professional artist, yet I still have no idea where I will be working next year.

Sometimes I feel like I've been pedaling 100 miles per hour with no destination in sight. Right now, I am at the point where I have applied to all of the school districts in feasible driving distance from where I live (some being as much as 45 minutes away), but most high schools have not started interviewing outside candidates yet, so I am waiting...

I can only take one grad school class this summer because it is the only one offered that I need, so I feel like it is time wasted that I could be working toward my degree. I should be able to take a full load while I'm not working, but no. There are 3 classes that I want/need to take for the fall, but there is no way I can take that big of a load while (hopefully) working full time and living more than an hour from my college. grrrrrr

I have done all I can do when it comes to trying to get hired! I've applied to schools, met and stayed in close contact with the arts coordinator at the district where I would prefer to work, subbed at this district, volunteered for VASE, and even presented a workshop at State VASE where all of the coordinators and art teachers from all over the state of Texas were together in one place.

I interviewed at a middle school more than a month ago and they are "still in the interview process" and was told that a decision would be made soon. Now, it is the end of the year and I understand how busy they are. I would never fault any principal for taking their time to make the right decision for their school. In fact that may be a good sign about the school that they take their art program seriously. However, I'm not sure my stomach can't take this suspense for too much longer!

I unofficially visited a high school that was supposed to have an opening with the understanding that I would be called in for an official interview once the internal hiring period ended. Come to find out the teacher who was supposed to be leaving is not leaving anymore. Great...

I have an upcoming interview for an elementary position, which is awesome, but when are the high schools going to start calling me!?! I hate that it is all totally out of my control at this point. Then- I wonder if I do get an offer from the middle or elementary school, what will I do? I really like the middle school a lot, and am open to the elementary school, but I haven't even had the opportunity to interview at a high school yet. I would have a really hard time turning down a job at that middle school, but it makes me wonder if I should be more patient and wait to see if a high school job opens up or if I should block it out of my mind and just be grateful if I get an offer from a great school like the middle school!

I will be SO HAPPY when I have been hired and will know where I am going to be next year!I really hope it happens sooner rather than later so I can actually enjoy my summer somewhat instead of "having no plans and too much time and "feeling too restless to unwind"- (Bright Eyes)

4 comments:

Susan said...

Limbo is never a great feeling. I hope you can find a job soon. Good luck!!!

MLE said...

Thank you.

Anonymous said...

Em, I think that you are peddling uphill (a steep hill), but you are very near the top...from there you'll be able to see the path on the other side. Hang in there! Anntee

MLE said...

thanks Anntee